Saturday, March 19, 2011

Morning Madness and Psycho Neighbors

So, you all know how I love my new apartment. Yesterday, I even tweeted how I'm starting to like my noisy neighbor, because she seemed like a nice person, you know, from all the conversations that I hear because of her extreme loudness. However, I spoke too soon.

Last night, her and her friends stayed up till midnight talking, listening to music, watching t.v. Fine. This morning, I guess they went out and came back at around 5 a.m, talking loudly in front of my house. Fine. 7 a.m, there they go again with their loud traditional, weird music. Not Fine. I mean, come on! I slept at midnight, woke up at 5, and woke up again at 7? How is that fair? I mean, I get it, sometimes you're in a good mood and you want to wake up with music blasting, but surely, BE CONSIDERATE OF OTHER PEOPLE, RIGHT? Plus, it was the same weird, traditional song on repeat, over 3 times.

So, I woke up angry and told my Caretaker to handle that. The caretaker, decided to use me a his scape goat, and added a lot more stories to my 9 words, "please turn it down for the next few minutes" you know at least until when people are awake! The caretaker, goes and calls the wrong person, and tells her how I complained that they came in drunk last night, etc, and how she's making my life hell. Which is all true, but, I didn't say all that. My request was simple, "turn it down for a few more minutes", you know at least wait until the sun comes up on a SATURDAY MORNING!

So, the woman, who today I discovered is a total psycho, went, well, PSYCHO. She was up and down the hall screaming, "Why are you telling me to reduce my volume? Why are you telling me to reduce my volume? I'm paying money, not stones!" Now, if you're Kenyan, I'd like you to please imagine with me, a big woman, straight from, "the lakeside", still in her nightgown, screaming very dirty Kiswahili, with a broom in her hand.

The rampage continued to the caretakers house, where she was banging the door calling him, or rather screaming, "You idiot, you cow, all you're good for is eating grass!" Then she went back to the house, turned up the volume to max, and started screaming, "All you stupid neighbors, wake up!" Of course, by this point, I'm totally freaked out, I mean, I'd never seen anything like that. So I walked out, and asked her friend what was going on, and she told me how the caretaker told her, the neighbors were complaining that they came home late. I calmly explained that the music was too loud for 7 a.m and the SANE friend told me she's sorry and that she'd turn it down. At the same time, psycho woman was still continuing with her rampage.

I mean, come on, we all have radios, I mean, I have a pretty rocking sound system too, we all do, but, 7 a.m? Come on? Grow Up! Also, what's up with going psycho over such a small issue?

Anyway, this means two things for me.

  1. I'm never spending another weekend at my flat. I'd rather go to my mom's quiet house, comfortable bed. Oh, plus, yeah, maybe my mom misses me :-) Bonus, cuts on my electric bill and groceries, right?
  2. As soon as my bills come in this month, I'm moving to the other side of the building. I fear for my life. That's no exaggeration. Just this week, the psycho's boyfriend was fighting with some guy in front of my window, yes at 7 a.m. Today, I honestly thought that she'd attack me. I'm pretty tiny compared to her. I'm barely 5"4!!!


So, I guess the Christian me, should be, you know, praying for her or whatever. I am. Right now though, the prayers are mostly, "Oh God, punish this woman with hell fire and brimstone. Kick her out of my building" I know that's not right, but I can't help it :-)

On a serious note though, God, totally answers prayer, and I know nothing is far from his view, and everything on earth belongs to him, me, that woman, our music, our building. So, I should try to look at it from God's perspective. Not lose it so easily. Maybe God is trying to tell me I should wake up early. Or, trying to teach me tolerance. Ah, it has to be something! I just can't let myself believe that God is just putting me in this situation to get some entertainment out of my exasperation.

Oh, to add on to my "amazing" day, today, I went to town to pick up the car "William Pro" from my brother. This entailed a long, LONG walk from Bus Station to Alliance Francaise on Loita Street carrying my overnight bag and this heavy Dell. William's fuel gauge quit working a while ago, so, I asked my brother before I left, "Is the car fueled?" and he said, "Yeah, I just put 500 bob in the morning" I bet you can guess what happened next...

Before I get to that, in the interest of full disclosure, I should probably confess that I stopped at Capital Center used my weeks savings for coffee and Strawberry Black forest cake. Hey, I had a stressful morning, I needed Chocolate!!!! (By the way, I haven't drank coffee in almost 8 years. It's disgusting! Has coffee always been that bad? No matter how many sugar sachets I put in, it was still bitter. Plus, Dorman's are just a little bit ridiculous with their tiny palm-size coffee cups for 160 bob (biggest purchase regret ever!) The cake however, is still my favorite in the world. Anyway, this is totally irrelevant to the story.

....so, I'm driving back home, and, the car stalls, in the middle of traffic. It just died. Here's the kicker, I was like 2 seconds away from the Petrol Station. Surely William, why do you always stall 2 seconds away from Parking Spots or Petrol Stations. However, since I've become quite an expert with stalling cars, I was able to handle it pretty calmly, despite all the leering men, passing by, saying, "Aww, madam, sorry"

Please tell me this is the worst this week can get.






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