GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today is just one of those days that I honestly feel like flipping off the entire planet, locking mysef in my apartment, turning up the stereo and forgetting that the rest of the world exist.

Considering I did just flip off a coworker, I need to vent!

So, I'm angry...GRRRRRR!!!!!!!

Sometimes it's easy to put yoursself in overwhelming situations, say yes to everyone and everything just for the sake of avoiding confrontation or because you feel it will make life easier at that particular moment in time.

For example, today I gave a cleaning lady at work money for a fund raising at her church, not that its a bad thing to be generous, but I dont know anything about what they were raising money for, and she said she'd give me a card worth the amount of money I gave her and that didnt happen either. She's just been following me since last week and giving her money was easier than avoiding her forever. That makes me angry.

I'm angry that my caretaker isn't installing my new instant hot water shower head like he was supposed to months ago and now I have to wake up half an hour earlier to warm up water for a bath.

I'm angry that people can blatantly take credit for work that I did, and not show any appreciation whatsoever when I've gone out of my way.

I'm angry that I have to do that stupid CPA Paper yet again.

I'm angry that I feel like I haven't slept in days.

I'm angry for life's complications, and that life isn't as easy as being able to get what you want when you want it*

I'm angry that I still miss my dad.

I'm angry that I live in a tiny apartment, and I'm starting to get claustrophobic.

I guess I've been angry at a lot of things for a while, but I've been reluctant to show anger toward anyone...or infront of anyone...but I'm thankful for this blog where at least I can come to vent, and ease off some of this pressure. Get in touch with my feelings and all that..I feel better now, not thaat much better, but whatever's left can hopefully be resolved by a hot bath (grrr!!! not shower!!!) and passion fruit yoghurt.

Thoughts

At the end of yet another exhausting work day, I got home to find a black out...this sucked for two reasons, firstly I had a couple of new DVDs I wanted to watch, and secondly, I was having one of those nights where you just dont want to be alone with your thoughts.

Alone with my thoughts I was and I'm happy because it gave me a chance to think a little and clear my head.

Life has just been sort of speeding past me and I'm living in the moment, which isnt necessarily a bad thing, but it's nice once in a while to step back and plan a little.

Some of the stuff I was sorting through my head were:

> school...I'm debating whether to sit for my CPA Papers this December or skip them all together and focus on my degree, especially considering final exams may clash and I might end up having to pick one over the other...

> work...my internship has been amazing so far, but its slowly but surely coming to an end, and I have to start planning for life after here. I love working and it's going to be tough goin back to not working, so I have to figure out if I want to do that or get another job, or whatever. Also, as long as I'm here I have to keep trying to be at the top of my game...figure out what my strengths and weaknesses have been.

> love...don't get me started....

Anyway, that's a little bit of what's been going on...

Thoughts

At the end of yet another exhausting work day, I got home to find a black out...this sucked for two reasons, firstly I had a couple of new DVDs I wanted to watch, and secondly, I was having one of those nights where you just dont want to be alone with your thoughts.

Alone with my thoughts I was and I'm happy because it gave me a chance to think a little and clear my head.

Life has just been sort of speeding past me and I'm living in the moment, which isnt necessarily a bad thing, but it's nice once in a while to step back and plan a little.

Some of the stuff I was sorting through my head were:

> school...I'm debating whether to sit for my CPA Papers this December or skip them all together and focus on my degree, especially considering final exams may clash and I might end up having to pick one over the other...

> work...my internship has been amazing so far, but its slowly but surely coming to an end, and I have to start planning for life after here. I love working and it's going to be tough goin back to not working, so I have to figure out if I want to do that or get another job, or whatever. Also, as long as I'm here I have to keep trying to be at the top of my game...figure out what my strengths and weaknesses have been.

> love...don't get me started....

Anyway, that's a little bit of what's been going on...

This One's For Mich

Here's one for Michelle.

My second year of High School, she was the new girl, who just happenned to be my new roomate. The first time I met her, I judged her as being one heck of a snob, and she knows this and she admits to being one. As time went by I tried to avoid her as much as possible, and she made friends of her own, and we lived paraallel lives. A few months later though, after a huge fight with one of my friends, she was there and talked me through it and I knew I had to be her friend.

Thus began the competition between my other roomate and I on who will be Michelle's best friend, and being the drama queen (like me) that she is, she loved it. But after a while, all three of us got to be really great friends...our friendship was LEGENDARY and I'm sure people are still talking about it.

When we got out of school, none of us had phones, and Michelle was very anti-facebook, so we lost touch for a couple of months, but when we found each other again...everything was as perfect as ever and we grew closer than before.

Skip ahead past all the boy drama, shopping trips, periods of silence, arguments, being fed up with each other, (mostly her of me), to two years ago when my dad died. I called up Michelle, and within an hour she was at my door...she dropped everything to be there for me. She stood by me as guests came and went, she held my hand, she got into an argument with my cousin because he stole my dads watch and wore it that day, she came with me to the funeral, all the way out of town in a stuffy squeezed car, when I finally broke down and cried she was there to catch me as I fell. She was amazing that day, and no matter what I do I can never repay her for that day.

Skip forward a couple of yeras, when I was stuck in the most horrible of horrible relationships and she was always there to lecture my then boyfriend and finally force me to end that naaaasty thing.

Anyway, there plenty more stories to come, and I can't wait to sip wine and watch our kids play together and our husbands burn the meat.

I love you bestie, you're more than my best friend, you're my sister and I wish you nothing but the best.

New Beginings

I've been looking over my old posts and I cannot believe how much I've changed over the past couple of months. I'm really glad I had this sort of platform to journal my life because I can look back on the hard moments, the great moments, lessons learnt and all that.

However, I feel like I have changed a bunch, and due to that change, the blog needs a bit of a change too. So, I'll be working on that, giving you guys some details on the changes that have been happening, and just working a little harder on this little piece of internet land of mine.

Happy Sunday!!!

Taking Care of a Sick Wife

O.K, so technically, I'm not a wife yet, I'm just engaged, but forget about that. This weekend I caught a pretty bad cold, luckily, Cappy was around to take care of me...it took a bit of training but he got the hang of it.

Friday:
I started feeling a sniffle coming on, and a fever too, all this while I was at work...so I called Cappy and he picked me up after work and took me home, which saved me from having to walk all the way to the bus stop and getting on a bus. He did my dishes, made me warm apple cider vinegar and honey which is my "chicken soup" because I take it whenever I'm sick and set up my favorite DVD's for me to watch in bed, and basically left me all set up before he left.

Saturday:
Early morning he was already back, did my dishes from the previous night. Lectured me on not eating dinner that he left...he's got to understand though, that when I'm sick, I can't eat! Brought a few movies for us to watch, brought a million oranges, for a vitamin C kick. I was a bore to be around, honestly...I couldn't talk because of my sore throat and I was moody, but he was a good sport and stuck around.

Sunday:
Woke up feeling so much worse, so I sent Cappy on a Pharmacy run. I thought I'd tough it out and not take any drugs but by this morning I was screaming for painkillers...that meant we both missed going to Church, but there was no way I'd have been able to make it. I feel so much better, right now I'm just in bed writing and relaxing.

Best part of the past three days, a couple of hours ago we were watching Modern Family and something really funny happened, and I laughed, and he said, he missed hearing me laugh, how cute is that...then he said I sound like a teenage boy cracking his voice...that's how it goes, taking the good with the bad.



XO.... T.M

1 Year Bible :-)

It's been ages since I did a One Year Bible post, but I thought I'd share a couple of todays verses to mull over...
1Kings 18:21, "....how long will you waver between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him; but if Baal is God, follow him."
Acts 11:9 "The voice spoke from heaven a 2nd time, 'Do not call anything impure that God has made clean.' "